Imogene thought she could like never, ever hate anyone more than that cray cray blonde bitch who’d come with her from that storage space building to the hospital. Cray cray bitch had the def-not-woke hospital peeps thinking Imogene was pregnant too! So now she had to lie on her back like to keep from miscarrying when…duh!…that blood must be her period, proving she couldn’t be pregnant. Even worse, OMG, they effin’ wouldn’t let her use her phone!
Imogene was staring at the peeling paint on the dirty white ceiling, but she was thinking about ^URS, who always made her laugh.
How would ^URS Snapchat-filter this ceiling?
She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t imagine how to Snapchat-filter that OMG ugly ceiling. She couldn’t make herself laugh. She couldn’t do anything to escape OMG ugly Real Life! She couldn’t do anything without ^URS.
The door slammed open. Some nurse was Draking about how there was no room in Oncology. Some super-sexy-cute guy shoved a gurney through the door, heading for the empty bed by the window with a bunch of other peeps in white. Thirsty, Imogene craned her neck to watch him, but they like yanked the curtain separating the room’s two beds and all she could do was listen to her new roommate Draking about how much getting transferred to the bed hurt.
OMG Real Life was ugly.
Finally the super-sexy-cute guy came out from behind the curtain.
Imogene did her best to look super-sexy-cute herself, though it was hard when all she had to work with was that her chest had gotten bigger lately, for no apparent reason. “Uh, like, could you please help me?”
“Sure. What’s up?”
“There’s, like, not even a TV in this room. They told me I’m supposed to lie on my back, but that’s only because they, like, think I’m pregnant, and I’m not, and…”
“Sorry, no TV in this room. Sorry, gotta go.”
What? Not even a TV?
The last nurse to leave pulled the curtain back. Maybe Imogene could at least, like, talk to her new roommate, who, like herself, was def not pregnant…way too thin. But they must have like given her new roommate something to shut her up. She was all out cold with her tongue hanging out. Besides she was all gray and, worst of all, she was really, really, really old.
Real Life was cray cray ugly.